# Important documents for aging parents: what to have and where it is

> Checklist of documents for aging parents: healthcare POA, HIPAA release, advance directive, DNR/POLST, financial POA, will. Where originals are and who has copies.

Canonical: https://getparentfile.com/guides/documents-for-aging-parents  
Updated: 2026-10-25 · Publisher: ParentFile  
Organizational guidance for families. Not medical or legal advice.

## Short answer

The core set is: a healthcare power of attorney (healthcare proxy), an advance directive or living will, a HIPAA authorization naming family members, a DNR or POLST if your parent has chosen one, a durable financial power of attorney, a will or trust, and their insurance cards and ID. For each one, write down whether it exists, where the signed original is, and who holds a copy. An elder-law attorney can tell you what's valid in your parent's state.

## Information is not authority

Having your parent's medication list lets you *tell* the hospital what they take. It doesn't let you *decide* anything, or even guarantee that staff will share information with you. That takes documents your parent signs while they're able to. That's why families who wait until a crisis often find they can't act when they need to.

> This page helps you find and organize documents. It isn't legal advice. The names, forms and rules differ by state and country, so ask an elder-law attorney or legal aid service what your parent needs.

## The checklist

For each document, answer three questions: **Does it exist? Where is the signed original? Who has a copy?**

| Document | What it does (in plain terms) | Have it? | Original kept at | Copies with |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Healthcare power of attorney / healthcare proxy | Names who makes medical decisions if your parent can't | | | |
| Advance directive / living will | Records your parent's wishes about treatment | | | |
| HIPAA authorization | Lets named people receive health information | | | |
| DNR / POLST / MOLST (if any) | A medical order about resuscitation and other treatment, signed with a clinician | | | |
| Durable financial power of attorney | Names who handles money and property | | | |
| Will and/or trust | Says how assets are distributed after death | | | |
| Medicare, Medicaid, supplement, Part D cards | Needed at every appointment and the ER | | | |
| Photo ID, Social Security card | Identity | | | |
| Medicare authorization (form CMS-10106) | Lets 1-800-MEDICARE talk to named people | | | |
| Long-term care / life insurance policies | Coverage and contacts | | | |

AARP's legal checklist for family caregivers lists the same core four: a durable financial power of attorney, a healthcare power of attorney, a living will (part of an advance directive) and a will ([AARP](https://www.aarp.org/caregiving/financial-legal/caregivers-legal-checklist/)).

## Health documents, one by one

### Healthcare power of attorney (healthcare proxy)

The person your parent names (the "agent", "proxy" or "surrogate", depending on the state) can make medical decisions when your parent can't make or communicate them. Hospitals will usually ask for a copy. MedlinePlus Magazine (from the National Library of Medicine) suggests choosing a trusted family member, friend or advisor, and making sure key people know where the documents are ([MedlinePlus Magazine](https://magazine.medlineplus.gov/article/advance-care-plan-a-checklist-for-the-future)).

### Advance directive and living will

An advance directive is the umbrella term for legal documents used if someone can't communicate their wishes. A living will is the part that records treatment preferences. Many states combine the living will and healthcare proxy in one form. The National Institute on Aging publishes free advance care planning guides and worksheets ([NIA caregiving resources](https://www.nia.nih.gov/health/caregiving)).

### HIPAA authorization

Under the HIPAA Privacy Rule, a provider *may* discuss information with family members involved in a patient's care when the patient agrees or doesn't object, or when the provider judges it's in the patient's interest. But "may" isn't "must", and practices differ. A signed HIPAA authorization naming you and your siblings removes the guesswork with doctors, hospitals and insurers ([HHS: HIPAA and family members](https://www.hhs.gov/hipaa/for-professionals/faq/when-does-hipaa-allow-a-health-care-provider-to-dicuss-information-with-family/index.html)).

For Medicare specifically, your parent can sign form CMS-10106 so that 1-800-MEDICARE can share information with up to two named people ([CMS](https://www.cms.gov/cms10106-authorization-disclose-personal-health-information)).

### DNR, POLST or MOLST

These are medical orders, completed with a clinician, not just wishes on paper. If your parent has one, emergency responders usually need to see the signed form, so its location matters as much as its existence. Many families keep it on the fridge or by the bed. The National POLST site explains the form and links to state programs ([National POLST](https://polst.org/)).

## Financial and legal documents

### Durable financial power of attorney

Names who can manage bank accounts, pay bills and handle property. "Durable" means it stays valid if your parent loses capacity. AARP notes that a "springing" POA, which takes effect only under certain conditions, is an alternative, but its expert generally advises against it.

### Will or trust

A will doesn't help while your parent is alive, but knowing that one exists, and where the original is, saves a great deal of trouble later.

## Where to keep everything

- **Originals** in one known, safe place: a fireproof box at home, or with the attorney who drafted them. A safe-deposit box can be hard to open in a hurry, so check who has access.
- **Copies** of the healthcare documents with the healthcare agent, the primary doctor, and in your parent's hospital "go" folder.
- **A one-page map** listing every document, where the original is and who has copies. This is the page siblings will thank you for.

## Starting the conversation

Many adult children find this the hardest part. A few approaches that families report work:

- Start with your own documents: "I'm doing my will and healthcare proxy, have you done yours?"
- Tie it to something concrete, such as a friend's hospital stay or a news story.
- Focus on what your parent wants, not on what might go wrong.
- Involve siblings early, so nobody feels left out or blindsided later. See [sharing a parent's care with siblings](https://getparentfile.com/guides/sharing-parent-care-with-siblings).

## UK readers

In England and Wales the equivalents are the two Lasting Powers of Attorney (health and welfare, and property and financial affairs), registered with the Office of the Public Guardian. See our [UK checklist](https://getparentfile.com/guides/uk-message-in-a-bottle-lpa-checklist).

## Where ParentFile fits

ParentFile's documents map is this checklist built into the app. For each document you record whether you have it, where the original is and who holds a copy, and can optionally attach a scan. The ER sheet shows where the healthcare proxy and any DNR/POLST are kept. It doesn't create or validate legal documents.

## Frequently asked questions

### What legal documents do I need for my elderly parent?

Most families start with a healthcare power of attorney (healthcare proxy), an advance directive or living will, a HIPAA authorization, a durable financial power of attorney and a will. Add a DNR or POLST only if your parent chooses one with their clinician. An elder-law attorney can confirm what's valid in your parent's state.

### What's the difference between a healthcare proxy and a living will?

A healthcare proxy (healthcare power of attorney) names a person to make medical decisions. A living will records the person's own wishes about treatment. Many states combine them into one advance directive form.

### Do I need a HIPAA release form to talk to my parent's doctor?

Not always. HIPAA allows providers to share relevant information with family involved in care when the patient agrees or doesn't object. But a signed HIPAA authorization naming you avoids uncertainty, especially with insurers and when your parent can't speak for themselves.

### Where should I keep my parent's power of attorney?

Keep the signed original in a safe place you can reach quickly, such as a fireproof box or with the drafting attorney, and give copies to the agent and, for healthcare documents, the primary doctor. Write down where everything is.

### Can I talk to Medicare on my parent's behalf?

Yes, if your parent authorizes it. They can sign form CMS-10106 to let 1-800-MEDICARE share their information with up to two named people.

## Sources

- [A Legal Checklist for Family Caregivers](https://www.aarp.org/caregiving/financial-legal/caregivers-legal-checklist/), AARP
- [When does HIPAA allow a health care provider to discuss information with family?](https://www.hhs.gov/hipaa/for-professionals/faq/when-does-hipaa-allow-a-health-care-provider-to-dicuss-information-with-family/index.html), U.S. Department of Health and Human Services
- [Authorization to Disclose Personal Health Information (CMS-10106)](https://www.cms.gov/cms10106-authorization-disclose-personal-health-information), Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services
- [Advance care plan: A checklist for the future](https://magazine.medlineplus.gov/article/advance-care-plan-a-checklist-for-the-future), MedlinePlus Magazine (NIH)
- [POLST](https://polst.org/), National POLST